its such things that make it all worthwhile. :>

Was rereading the card belinda.ber dear wrote me for my birthday. Imprinted was May the world always be as beautiful for you as you make it for others! *grin* But what really touched me was her last handwritten line

~All the things you have taught me, the way to Christ, the way God wants us to live and also the way of handling things...I will bear them in mind (A promise to you also)~

Awww....Dear ber, you never fail to lift my spirits when i really see the seed of faith God has planted in your heart, taking root in your life. you are one daughter whom i always see in your heart, burning passion for the Lord, no matter how silent it is. it is such a delight to run in the good race towards Christ with you! i fully understand the fears in your heart right now; loving God and parents together should never be this hard. But remember, perfect love drives out fear (1 John 4:18); by putting and loving God first in your life, you will love your parents towards Christ too. Push on dear; i'm running along with you! thank God for you so much; and thank you ber for loving me. *tight hug*

And yah, you are one of the most teachable gals too dear. you know what, a teachable heart was what Jesus honoured the most in His disciples. they weren't the cleverest, richest..cream of the crop. they simply had a heart of passion. :>

superhero gal

All I need is a good disguise. One where nobody can recognise. That I’m feeling so small. All I need is a secret weapon. I’ve gotta have faith. Zapping monsters into outer space. I’m gonna be a Superhero. Na-na-na-na-na-na. Na-na-na-na-na-na-na. Na-na-na-na-na-na-Yeah.

If I were a little girl. Trying to clean up the whole wide world. I’d kick the bad boys back to school. Teach them fighting’s just not cool. I’d give every kid a teddy bear. Turn starving people into millionaires. Break glass ceilings with dynamite. sprinkle a little sugar and spice. Turn the bullies that terrorize. Into pink poodles that bark, but don’t bite. corrinne may's little superhero gal.

the wanderlust in me was acting up again, so i began on a visual adventure through yangon to central myanmar. it had been almost a year since i flipped through my burmese clicks; dust was virtually choking my nose in the form of nostalgia. oh my what a mystifying world out there; God's awesomeness portrayed in the mysterious forms and shadows and colors.

copycat rainbows. no double vision here.

my room. my broom. myself.

vastness of land against verticality of architecture

ancient majesty, desolate land; mystifying ruins
(click on the pictures to let them fill your eyes...)

lunch with ling yesterday noon was light and easy. it was good to meet her up after so long, and exciting giggle-ishly to hear of her baby plans.

when she was sharing about the parable of the ten virgins (matthew 25), what it means to keep both our lamps (our relationship of intimacy with the Lord) and oil (fueling it with God's word and truth?) ready before the second coming of Christ, we were both reminded of the importance of snuggling sweetly into our Father's embrace each day. yes, jesus can say 'he doesnt know us' (v.12) when we lose track of that privilege we are given. Key to keeping the lamp burning, fear of the Lord.

indeed as we move closer to Him, He reveals mysteries to us (daniel 2:28). just like how a person would share his secrets with his most trusted budds. As ling shared this as her deep desire for spiritual growth, i was reminded of joyce's telling me 'God told me you are His friend' after my g12 sisters prayed for me for my 24th birthday last friday (Not forgetting jasmine's vision of a gigantic shower of gold dust upon me. wow). And on the finale of the re-encounter at sofitel on mon, a newly-known sister prayed the exact same thing over me. wow. Father, how can i ever receive such an honour of being called Your friend?

God called me His friend twice in the past four days!

doing a little cursy bow

had one of my simplest yet most blessed birthdays yesterday *grin*

*A big rainbow thanks again to all of you

who called, smsed, msned, emailed, friendster-ed me your well wishes; they are deeply appreciated!*

*A big wave of thanks to the horde of springfield sec students! there are too many of you to list! =P *

*Not forgetting those who came down to especially make it special over these few days, esp the dino bros!*

*To my dear mum, thanks for that dinner treat and those gifts; i'd rather you cook really!*

*thanks to my dear daddy for remembering and calling*

*thanks my dear gals, you really shouldnt have spent... =P*

*to little weiliang, your handmade card is very precious to me! thanks for the thought & efforts!*

*a pre-prepared thanks to my spiritual ahma & g12 sisters, who're celebrating for me tonight! Haa!*

~does a little cursy bow~

you all made me move in a dance-and-twirl fashion the whole day. *grin*

And this, like a blotch of ink from the wizard's feather pen, is chromatographing into my today, tomorrow... sofitel here i come!

__________

that half-hour intense with the Lord's presence on wednesday night was the highlight of my week till today to speak. i never felt so absent of myself while praying. yes indeed, going on my knees was all i needed to do.

i guessed i must have prayed intensely for at least twenty persons that night, including every of my girls. Nope it wasnt mind-boggling at all. the Spirit wasnt in me, i was in Him. He led me continually into praying in deep and specific details for each person, on and on. there wasnt a pause for more than five seconds. the weight of my body was beginning to sink onto my both hands, being in that knelt posture all the time. but the Spirit just wanted to pray. Jesus's Cross was right in front of me.

when i finally opened my eyes and stood up, i felt supernatural. heh. A new surge of greater faith was blossoming in my soul; i sensed it and i smiled, amidst the occasional ouch-es because of the pain in my knees and the hurting strain in my wrists (due to kneeling on the floor for too long). But i stepped out of my bath with an indescribable joy and strength in my heart (yesh it was the bath again). Thank You Father. :>

rainbows & hugs...

s.u.n.flower

haa going into the 11 1/2th hour of my birthday this year...and i'm already feeling like the most blessed woman on earth. :>

the dino boys came to celebrate for me last night, and gosh they never fail to make me laugh in such innocent humor and cheer. and gosh didnt they shower me with an avalanche of gifts - personal, 'corporate' - you name it all. These include a poster of botero's oil painting of the most beautiful lady in his life, the little blue teddy and cute pouch from dear cerwin, an adorable mug from dear samuel, and such an exquisite rare specimen of nautilus from bro bun, even assembled by him himself. thank God for the dino tribe again. :> i made my birthday wish for you all; have faith.

thank you all my bros and sisters who sprinkled my late last night and this early morning with those twinkles of blessings and well wishes on msn and sms too. cant give thanks to the Lord enough for each of you. dear ah-c even smsed from china!

what really made my day this morning were all the incessant smses from the uncountable kids from springfield sec, those classes i got to talk and speak into last year at thumbs-up in their school. it was as though they announced my birthday over their PA system this morning. haa. yesh last year! God how you have preserved the bonds... they made me feel like making a trip down their school now, gathering them (in Jesus's name!) and giving them all a real big hug! i declare all of them sons and daughters of God in Your name Father! really didnt think they would remember; wait i dont even remembering telling them my birthday. i thank You Lord for their love. there have been so many breakthroughs on their side, but Lord, more. :>

i feel like a sunflower today........... :>

*hug hug pat pat squeeze squeeze muahx muahx*

*munching on a mini vanilla cornetto* (since its 1/3 the size of a normal cornetto, it relieves me of 2/3 of the guilt in having a cornetto. heee)

i have never tried suppressing my chuckles so hard like today. you guys should know my free-spirited laughters. i burst into laughters like the way spongebob would explode out of his spongey frame (and squarepants). i can also giggle in choking sniffles incessantly. and yes i do have machine-gun or airplane-engine laughs too, amanda dear. nope i didnt copyphin. =P

scene: sophiscated meeting room of Kajima Design/Overseas Asia, 6th floor Parkway Parade
parties involved: the architect muro-san, the overall local consultant yamade-san, and their assistant, 3 client consultants just flown in fresh from japan, my boss aka uncle, and myself.

causes for incessant chuckles without antidote:
1) one of the client consultant was wearing too long a sleeve on both arms, and coupled with his comical unshaven face, made him look really like a cartoon character some sort of like shaggy.
2) another client consultant, this cute old man with a cheeky smile, carrys an eraser in the shape of a sushi in his pencil case. And he digged it out to hurl it at the architect when he asked for one.


i could really feel that laughing gene bobbing up and down in my frame so much, that i had to excuse myself to go to the washroom to release it. and i feel it again now. haaaa...

_____________________

to my amanda dear: thanks for always being so open to me, even though you usually show it behind technological gadgetry. remember every disappointment is an appointment with God. dont allow satan to have any seat in that sweet little meeting with your heavenly Father. just want to affirm you that you are truly loved, and always worthy to be loved by God and me. i want your *hug hug pat pat squeeze squeeze muahx muahx* to continue every night on sms okay? heeee.... they really make me smile every night. thanks for loving me too dearie. :> i thank God for you again. and again.

*hug hug pat pat squeeze squeeze muahx muahx*

to my belinda dear: dont worry, i wont pack my bags to travel around the world, and forget about you. haa. you all are too precious for me to 'discard'. dear ah, i can 'see' you with your 144 already heh heh.

*hug hug pat pat squeeze squeeze muahx muahx*

going to have dinner with eloisa dear tmrw! cant wait to go to simin dear's house with you two on thurs too! anyway i think your good dino bros are going to give me a birthday bomb tmrw. argh. sweet cerwin was so sad that i wasnt going service on sat cos of retreat, and the next moment his dino tribehead called. thank God for dino bros. haaa...

i love encounter camps!

encounter camps never fail to blow me away. At the last two i wasnt even a participant - was a guide at the first where God swept me off my feet thru the powerful vision He gave me thru Ps Victor (its the heading of my blog), and then visitor at the second which just ended last evening. took my hat off Ps Seng Lee and Ps Jo esp at their Holy Spirit session; was so bowled over by the Presence of God that i fell backwards on my chair when Ps Jo was praying for me. like what dear sister kelly said, the presence of God was so strong that sometimes we couldnt take it haa. indeed when i was praying for two gals at inner healing, i felt a wave of giddiness for a few moments. real spiritual warfare. but God is strong as i am weak. :>

:>

the Lord's hand is indeed upon me, and between me and my gals. thank you lord for stirring up lifechanging transformations in wei at the ongoing encounter now. thank you lord for her openness. lord more of you in our bond Father.

simin was in church today! the little sweetie caused my heart to skip a beat when she told me 'yes! she only wants me as her spiritual mother when she is ready to receive christ. nobody else.' ha, thank you Lord. i pray that you do not draw her closer to me, but You in me. :> *wooh i love the way she put her arm around my waist and rested her head against me.*

it was an amazing day out with the zhang siblings truly. edwin, simin and weiliang couldnt stop 'suan'-ing each other, but yet in these they reveal such strong love and support for one another. they put me to shame a few times. i think i treat my own bro less than what they have for one another. the beauty in simin's love for her bros simply blew me away too. awww...what a beautiful 'mother' already. well the destiny of every of my gals is to be sarah, mothers of nations. seems like she's on her way. haa wooh. *excited*

and yesh, my mum asked me to book seats for my entire family for Parents Appreciation Dinner this year! though my parents are still not all keen, and they still mumble grumble over it being a church stuff, at least confirming the seats allow me more time and space and faith to pray harder for them before 1 june! And precious Father you never fail to give me more than i ask for - my uncle is already confirmed coming! Been praying for my family to come since a year ago, been fasting recently for this....awww God you swept me off my feet again.

pray pray pray! in intercession and spiritual warfare!

*birthday wish for this year* to have all my daughters come together to celebrate for me! :>

i lost the magic of an architectural student!

oops that must have been the fourth time my mind literally slept away thru the worship music playing on my desktop, my position fixated with one hand on the keyboard, the other on the mouse. it all looked like i was staring hard at the monitor screen, but the thing was my eyes werent open, for that ten seconds or so.

i think i have lost the magic of an architectural student! no longer can i sleep two hours or even non-hours, and yet look amazingly fresh-faced the following daybreak. mirabel mirabel i think you have been too tired. or is it the combined effect of fasting + starved sleep?

kind of wish i was whizzed away to lanzhou together with the china mission team which i sent this early dark morning, instead of being bogged by this boring routine of deskboundness. (mirabel put on your nikes once more. dont you always miss those days of running across the expressway on the intersecting highway??)

i wish i could be somewhere praying in tongues for hours and hours non-stop. there are so many things to pray for! just bathing in my spiritual self with my Beloved... once again i cant wait for ej288 retreat. cant help thanking God for this great honour to be able to go this year too. sofitel here i come!!! wooooohhh!

kind of anticipating this year's birthday as well. nope not gonna spend it special or what, but after bring immersed more deeply and lovingly into my spiritual family, i do somehow eagerly await the little surprises that will be popped on me in a week's time. yesh yesh no more 'personal treats' with anyone alone. thats my rule from now on. exception goes to my mum.

i declare to the whole world: my family will be saved!!! hooray! cos i believe! :> cos God said so!!!

happy mummy's day my dear mummy

yesterday was a good mothers' day. i gave my mum a good finger-breaking massage as the night fell darker, not forgetting to take the chance to poke her at the sides whenever i could. alright i'm naughty. *shaking a finger at myself*

couldnt sleep again tonight. nopenope i'm not bothered by things. i guess the non-zZzzZzz monster has got me again. i guess he has gotten me since my architecture days. god help! *eyelids halfclosed*

but i had a good time praying for my dear bro jk while lying on my bed just now. nope i'm not a worrying freak, but i learnt the power of pre-prayers thru stormie omartian's book the.power.of.a.praying.parent (buzz me if you are scratching your head over why i am reading this book now). i prayed against bad company, bad leaders, bad habits for my bro in the army (he's gonna be a recruit at the end of this year!), against serious injuries and accidents; and plead with the Lord to grant him much love and right influence while teaching him the discipline he needs in his life. o lord protect and bless my bro.

i didnt mean to use blogging as a sleeping pill. but it seems like it is going to nail me to the bed right now, and grant my beauty sleep. yeah for 2.5 hrs only. but better than nought. here i come my beddy bed bed.

which key?

whenever i feel helpless, i ask God for the key. But today i realise perhaps i should be asking, "Father which key should i use?", cos He has already given me the bunch of keys.

album playing: always and forever _planetshakers

it just makes you want to worship Him. not cos of the music. but cos of Him.

wow wow wow. should i have gone for this?? 

singing prayers.

lately i began to pray to God in the form of singing. the words just flowed with music conjured out of my mind. definitely no perfect songs. but they do seemed to flow nice.

there has been a song kept in my heart, with just these mere words that i repeat again and again, and which reveal my cry for this fatherless young generation:

turn the hearts of Your children to You Father. turn the hearts of the children to You.
turn the hearts of the children to their fathers. turn the hearts of the fathers to them. (and You).

album playing: safe in a crazy world _corrinne may

You keep me flying.You keep me smiling.You keep me safe in a crazy world.You understand me.Embrace my fragililty.You keep me safe in a crazy world.And in your arms I find the strength.to believe in me again.

you guys should visit corrinne may's songs at http://www.myspace.com/corrinnemay.

very heartfelt pieces. but i would not recommend an overdose. her songs shine a thin ray of hope through several layers of melancholy. its whether you let yourself be blanketed by the layers or catch that glimpse that ray. (jing dear, this last line is especially for you)

c.a.s.i.NO

my spirit still feels that hint of anger and my heart still pained at the government's decision to build the irs. you know the more they talked about protecting the nation's people from the casinos, the most startling clear it shows that these people fully understood the ills of having one. hmmpf. another question on my mind was, are the lives of the foreigners any less worthy to be protected from these? so exposing tourists to the darkness-es of the never-will-you-win gambling tables and jacks is deemed okay here, as long as they contribute to our economy, even with their lives at stakes?

o lord, we know every person matters to you. singaporean or not. thank you for having blessed singapore so much. you protected us from the tsunamis which could have swept us out in a single swoosh. may your hand continue to be upon this land. i pray that you will not allow any darkness to take over. have mercy my father. hear our cry. (yes. build a disneyland if you will to. *wink to bro whale*)

i am a flower quickly fading.

who am i, that the Lord of all the earth
would care to know my name
would care to feel my hurt
who am i, that the Bright and Morning Star
would choose to light the way
for my ever wandering heart

not because of who i am
but because of what you've done
not because of what i've done
but because of who You are

i am a flower quickly fading
here today and gone tomorrow
a wave tossed in the ocean
a vapor in the wind
still You hear me when i'm calling
Lord, You catch me when i'm falling
and You've told me who i am
i am Yours, i am Yours

who am i. casting crowns. casting crowns.

album playing: 1.A.M. Revelation

this album holds an upward dimension. when i listen to every song on it, specifically holy spirit come, in awe and you are my all, my heart is lifted, and my sight fixates unto Him. all the time. my heart agrees and aligns with every word in the songs.

thank you lord for this worship band. it is truly your anointed one. :>

it's a b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l sunday.

yeah its a beautiful sunday, a really joyful one as well. You ask me what happened? well today i spent more than half of my day at bt panjang plaza's macs and lot one's macs consecutively. Doesnt sound exciting enough? :>

haa well cos i was with my two beloved daughters! Seeing pat dear once again after that night at her void deck quite some time ago and her beaming face just warmed my heart with so much joy. (this is a hint to pat dear that i seldom see you smile =P) i could sense that she was largely encouraged each time her face lit up when i shared with her what God has been doing and teaching me in my life, and the testimonies from the pastors. Hang on there gal! Cos Jesus is hanging on for you, and i am too! :> *hug* This beautiful daughter is also growing into a lovely young lady! Growing her hair now! Wooh... :>

Next stop, cck macs. tuition with amanda dear. Frankly it was both a joyful and stressful time toiling together with this dear for her exams. haaa (but i dont mind lar gal =P) She was alternating between the trying-to-be-enthu mode and the totally-sianz mode cos we were doing her least favourite subject- chinese. And when she just chose to be quiet for so long, i just felt like grabbing her head and shaking it (in the hope that the answer will then pop into her mind). Luckily i chose to read my bible. But dear, i really sensed you trying. Continue to jia you okay. Hang on there too, cos Jesus and i are also hanging on for you! :> *hug*

~end of summary of my b.e.a.u.t.iful sunday~